Sanctuary and Serenity

Codependency

Posted on: March 27, 2010


Codependents frequently aren’t certain whom or when to trust.

Quit trying to make yourself trust someone you don’t trust.

We can trust ourselves.  We can trust ourselves to make good decisions about whom to trust.  Many of us have been making inappropriate decisions about trust.  It is not wise to trust an alcoholic to never drink again if that alcoholic has not received treatment for the disease of alcoholism.  It is not even wise to trust an alcoholic never to drink again if he or she has received treatment – there are no guarantees on human behaviour.  But we can trust people to be who they are.  We can learn to see people clearly.

Figure out if people’s words match their behaviours.  Is what they say the same as what they do?  As one woman puts it, “He’s looking real good, but he’s not acting any better.”

If we pay attention to ourselves and the messages we receive from the world, we will know whom to trust, when to trust, and why to trust a particular person.  We may discover we’ve always known whom to trust – we just weren’t listening to ourselves.

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